Golden years

Thanks for the background on Rumsfeld and the US military, not an area that I am familiar with at all. And for the link to Scythians and Scythia, I had never heard of them before .. a lack of a classical education I'm afraid.

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Sometimes I wish I would just not wake up one day.

Is this the "I'm a Christian I can't wait to get to Heaven" thing or "I've had enough and I don't want to wake up ever -- even in Heaven -- when I feel like this" thing?

I recall when my daughter was first taken away -- which was the darkest time of my life so far -- that I wanted it to just stop, I had had enough, there seemed to be too much pain and anguish in this world and I really no longer thought that I wanted to live.

Then of course, about 3 years later, I was shown very clearly that I really did want to live - I was shown that life is a state so rare and precious that I'd like to continue it for as long as possible, ok I may want to be a recluse on an island communing with nature until humanity learns not to war against itself, but that doesn't mean I don't treasure my life. Thank you for my life God.

Especially at times like this when both of the girls are happy in the room next door playing, it's a good thing. I'm wondering for how long does this responsibility to bring children up last? Well responsibility for them is forever of course, but the "bringing up" part, probably another 7-9 years of high-investment-quality time and then my job there is mostly done, the kids will want to spread their wings and fly into the world and practise what they've learned, making their own mistakes along the way too of course. I will be 50,51,52 then and what will I do? I don't know I just want to get there pal! If I can get to 55 and retire then maybe I will go and live on that island, who knows. Thinking about it, there are things called grandchildren, there may be no rest until the end :-)

What do we do in our twilight years?