High School Sweethearts

As painful as it was at the time, I look back on some of those days with a certain fondness. There's something exquisitely painful about longing so much for something and not achieving it. The yearning in my heart in 10th grade for Deana Frederick is something that, some 30+ years later, I still relish.

She rode the same school bus as I did. Two stories to relate:

• One day I ended up in the seat directly behind her. Some of her long, beautiful luxurious dark hair fell between the small gap between her seatback and the window. Hoping that nobody was noticing, I reached up and gently stroked the hair. My heart ached.
  
• Another day she got on the bus just before it pulled away to take us all home. I was sitting in the front seat and nobody was next to me. There were no other open seats, so she had to sit next to me. Remember, I knew through informal channels that she had a crush on me as well. She momentarily froze, then sat down next to me. My heart raced. Was this my opportunity to break the ice? Were it so ... I found myself utterly incapable of saying anything. I sat motionless the five miles to where I got up to depart the bus. When the bus pulled away I stood motionless in the cold winter air and berated myself senseless. My golden opportunity missed. No other opportunities such as that came along.

Again, with the distance of time and the knowledge of other blessings bestowed, those are now equisitely delicious memories to me.

Go figure, huh?